Artist Statement: Longing for love around food

 
 

It started from my longing for love.

 
 
 

When I was younger, I did not know why I suffered so much even if I was surrounded with people whom I loved. I felt a sense of sorrow when I saw the sun shining; when I heard the sound of dropping rain; when the fresh wind touched my hair; when I saw a tree standing alone and when the moon followed me. As I grew older, I started to realize that I was unsatisfied with everything around me because of loneliness deep-rooted in my heart.

Loneliness is primal lack which exists deep inside of human beings, and not only religions but also classical scholars and even today’s popular culture tell us that ‘to love is an ultimate way for one who desperately hopes to get away from this lack’. I have naturally longed for love without knowing when I began. Although I was a lonely kid, I always believed that I could overcome loneliness, and finally reach absolute peace one day with love.

 
  
 

At the corner of my heart, I have a memory of the time when my family sat around a table for dinner and ate rice together even after a busy day at work. At that time, we felt each other’s love even without words. This memory reminds me the moment of love brings pure happiness.

However, longing for it accompanies anxiety. Desires rise; one forces one’s own way of feeling to others, and hopes for a relationship to be continued in the same way regardless of time.

When I first fell in love, I was looking for a perfect man who can help me escape from my long-time loneliness. And a sense of attachment masquerades as love in our relationship. The more I loved him, the more I felt lonely. Because I craved love but did not know how to give love, love was painful.

 
  
 

Only if expressing my longing for love in images gives an opportunity to see how I share and long love in relationships.

By seeing the knots tied by the old habit of reacting in an unbalanced way through making art, I want to find peace in my mind, and share this story with other people. True love is unconditional, and the moment of this love calls for respect to life.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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About jei

Korean Visual Artist currently based in Chiang Mai.